When the belief that one's existence will be affirmed under any conditions is not firm, can you give examples of how the reinforced sense that one's existence is affirmed only under certain conditions shows up in concrete everyday situations?

This is more a generalization from experience than a theoretically grounded claim, but I think I've seen many cases where successful parents, busy as they are, only give time, attention, and positive feedback when the child shows a particular achievement, and the child ends up, without realizing it, spending their whole life tied to proving their own ability.